The way this deal works is that some chick named "Delilah" hosts a show where people call in and can tell stories or dedicate songs. Casey Kasem must be pissed if he knows...get your own gig lady. Anyway, she is chatting it up with various whiny callers about how their lives are so horrid. blah. blah. blah. Random caller #27 says, "My wife of 18 years just told me that she didn't love me anymore, and now she is living with my best friend". Delilah says, "Awww, you poor guy. I'm so very sorry that this happened to you...did you love her? Did you have any idea that she was going to do this? Are you still friends with your best friend? Here, let me dedicate this song to you"....and 'Ain't Nothing Gonna Break My Stride' starts playing. Bitch, please.
I decided that I now need to quit my gig as an over-worked finance person and host a radio show. My response would have been more along the lines of, "That skank hussy did WHAT? Are you kidding me? Listen, buddy - down deep, didn't you always know she had whoreish tendencies? Here's what you need to do. Run down to the Handy Pantry and get yourself an Olde English 40 oz. and a bag of Combos. I've got lots of single friends looking for a good man...no worries. Here's my song dedicated from you to your ex...a little number by Guns'n'Roses entitled, 'I Used To Love Her, But I Had To Kill Her'. Take care and best of luck to you."
~j
1 comment:
i think you found your true calling. and i already know a certain fellow employee that would be blowing you up every night..
-my husband won't come out of the back trailor
-everyone thinks my 9 year old is really 4 the way i treat her
-stanley!!!
-my roots have taken over my life.
gosh that felt good...the sad thing is i could keep going.
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